The Good Listening To Show: Stories of Distinction & Genius

"Hitting Rock Bottom 3 Times": The Extraordinary & Truly Inspirational Story of Adaptive Adventurer & Speaker Darren Edwards. Paralysed from the Chest Down after a Climbing Accident, to now 'Redefining the Impossible’ & Finding 'Strength through Adversity

• Chris Grimes - Facilitator. Coach. Motivational Comedian

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The extraordinary story of Darren Edwards, a remarkable Adaptive Adventurer  whose life took an unexpected turn. A climbing accident in North Wales left him paralyzed from the chest down, but Darren's story is far from one of defeat. Instead, he embraces a life full of resilience and ambition, challenging the limitations often associated with disability. With the backdrop of the Shropshire Hills fueling his spirit, Darren shares how he navigates life's challenges and opportunities, highlighting the profound advice he received that shifted his focus toward a future brimming with potential.

I had the privilege of hearing Darren speak at the recent Entrepreneurs Circle's "Entrepreneurs Convention 2024" at the Birmingham ICC.

Throughout our conversation, Darren reveals the power of everyday heroes who quietly persevere through their own battles, offering insight into how true strength lies not just in physical ability but in the heart and determination. We explore the importance of a supportive network, reflecting on his journey through adaptive expeditions and the influence of his wife and loved ones. Darren’s story takes us to unexpected places, where missed opportunities, like the Paralympics, become blessings that shape a fulfilling path as an adventurer.

Looking ahead, Darren’s ambition to sit-ski to the South Pole in December 2025 is a testament to his unyielding will to inspire others. As we discuss themes of talent versus effort, the episode serves as a powerful reminder that resilience often surpasses natural ability. Darren's narrative invites listeners to believe in the impossible and find purpose through adversity. Whether you seek inspiration, motivation, or a compelling tale of human spirit, this episode offers a heartfelt exploration of embracing life’s challenges with courage and determination.

Tune in next week for more stories of 'Distinction & Genius' from The Good Listening To Show 'Clearing'. If you would like to be my Guest too then you can find out HOW via the different 'series strands' at 'The Good Listening To Show' website.

Don't forget to SUBSCRIBE & REVIEW wherever you get your Podcasts :)

Thanks for listening!

Chris Grimes:

Welcome to another episode of the Good Listening To Show your life and times with me, chris Grimes, the storytelling show that features the Clearing, where all good questions come to get asked and all good stories come to be told, and where all my guests have two things in common they're all creative individuals and all with an interesting story to tell. There are some lovely storytelling metaphors a clearing, a tree, a juicy storytelling exercise called 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, some alchemy, some gold, a cheeky bit of Shakespeare and a cake. So it's all to play for. So, yes, welcome to the Good Listening To Show your life and times with me. Chris Grimes, are you sitting comfortably? Then we shall begin and begin. We shall Welcome to a very special episode on World Mental Health Day.

Chris Grimes:

World Mental Health Day, which is wholly appropriate because we've got an extraordinary individual. I ran out of superlative adjectives about you when I was thinking about what to say about you at the beginning, but I had the great privilege to see you speak recently at the Entrepreneurs Circle Entrepreneurs Convention at the Birmingham ICC a few weeks ago. I was there as a VIP, not because I'm important, because I paid a bit more money to be there, but we got to shake hands, and as we did so, I said we have Joe Bradshaw in common, and you immediately said oh fantastic, I love Joe Bradshaw, who's an Everest mountaineer, and she survived an avalanche last time. That happened as well, and so I thought brilliant, that will give me just a good excuse and reason to get in touch with you. So, darren Edwards, it's an extraordinary privilege to interview you. Welcome to you. I'll blow a bit more happy smoke at you shortly, but how's morale? What's your story of the day? First, darren?

Darren Edwards:

Yeah, yeah, good. Um, thank you for having me on. I should start by saying that and, um, to slightly quote jerry mcguire, you had me at not hello, but you had me at joe bradshaw. So, yeah, joe's someone I really look up to and, uh, I'm inspired by. So very glad to have met her, and likewise with you. Yeah, it was nice to. It was funny the thought that people actually wanted to come and have a photo with me, so I was yes, two things going on there.

Chris Grimes:

I do a lot of comedy, improvisation and in the universe of yes, and if you say yes, more in life, more doors on lubricated hinges can open. But also there's that lovely networking strategy which is all you need to do in life is, you know, make the connection of who am I, what's our connection and why am I talking to you, and then all sorts of possibilities can open up. And I'm really thrilled and honoured. As I said on World Mental Health Day of all days, you said yes to being here. I saw your very poignant post this morning about your father's suicide.

Chris Grimes:

Yeah, I appreciate we may or may not talk about that, but you're a groundbreaking adaptive adventurer, expedition leader and motivational speaker, and why you're an adaptive adventurer, of course, is the core of your story. So, as I curate you through the structure of the good listening to show you know it's going to be a great honor to curate you through the various gateposts. Um, but you just want to tell the story behind the story of why you are labelled as being as your own volition, as you've formed adaptive expeditions, why you would define yourself, just so our listeners who haven't got a context yet and if you have ears, prepare to open them now. This is the extraordinary Darren Edwards. So over to you just to answer that first rather convoluted I now realise question.

Darren Edwards:

No, no, no, no, no, no, thank you. Yeah, so I didn't start off life with that label of adaptive, or just I used to call myself a disabled adventurer, and then I kind of thought there's a huge irony in suggesting with the first word that you can't do something and all you do is go on and do things. But, and all you do is go on and do things. Um, but I started, you know, a bit like joe bradshaw. You know life as someone who was very passionate about mountaineering and climbing and and that being a huge part of my kind of sense of identity and and who darren edwards was as a 26 year old guy and when I look to my future I often look to the mountains I wanted to climb in the list that, the bucket list of adventures still to come.

Darren Edwards:

And then then, on the 6th of August, eight years ago, I was climbing in North Wales with my best friend, somebody who I'd climbed with for the best part of a decade by that point, and as I got to the top of a 250-foot section of cliff the short version of the story is, as I climbed to the top and stood with the drop beneath me, the section of rock that I happened to be stood on, which was, you know, four foot wide and two foot deep, collapsed beneath my feet and all of a sudden I found myself sort of falling off the top of World's End.

Darren Edwards:

And it was only the actions of Matt and I'm sure we can talk about it in more detail later you know that saved my, ultimately saved my life. But you know know, I landed on a ledge 40 foot down. I broke my back on impact, I severed my spinal cord, and that was the moment that Darren Edwards would be, you know, paralyzed from the chest down for the rest of his life and have to find a, not a new sense of identity, but would have to really rely on kind of, you know, perseverance and resilience, even if you don't feel resilient in the moment it happens um, to build back slowly but surely and to start that toughest fight of, of not giving into the temptation of of you know that label being disabled and not doing stuff anymore and when I listened to you again at the entrepreneurs, uh, you know the convention, the entrepreneurs convention.

Chris Grimes:

What I took from listening to you, if I may say, is that I thought this is extraordinary because this man has hit rock bottom.

Chris Grimes:

Excuse the metaphor, but three times yeah, um, and I know you called yourself a groundbreaking adaptive adventure and I thought, gosh, there's a extraordinary irony in that too. And the rock bottom was and I'm sure you'll unpack, this was actually the. The moment you hit the rock bottom severed your cord, as you said. But then you've had two other rock bottoms that it's wonderful that you've recovered from since. And and I know that that was, you know, the the demise of the relationship with, at the time, that, the love of your life, and I'm not stealing any thunder from you. And then the third one, of course, which I mentioned at the beginning, was this is now the three-year anniversary, I gather, of the, of the suicide of your own father as well yeah, yeah.

Darren Edwards:

So there was a literal rock bottom which was at the site of my climbing accident. There was the, yeah, emotional rock bottom of four and a half months later you know, just about to leave and and to to start living life again. And you know, my, my vision for the future had that one person very much in it and I needed that person to help me to, to sort of I don't know, to be resilient enough to get through the tough times, and that person ultimately couldn't see how we were going to survive as a, as a couple, and that was, yeah. If I thought rock bottom was my accident, then I was well truly wrong, because that emotional turmoil was so much harder to overcome. And I think that's so true of life, isn't it?

Darren Edwards:

The physical scars often heal quicker than the emotional ones. And then you know, you've touched on as well mental health day to day. And then three years ago I lost my dad, who was an old school man that didn't open up about his, his emotions and his own struggles and, and you know, just isolated himself more and more and ultimately couldn't find the light through the, through the dense trees. And every time mental health comes around, I do question whether or not things could have been different had the conversation that we're having as a society be a bit more progressive and a bit more open, that you know, one man can say to another man that he's struggling and to ask that bloke for help yes, very interestingly, I recently have done a show in bristol, where I'm lived, um, where I live, where I'm lived, uh, for the bristol beer factory, and they host men's talk clubs at Bristol Beer Factory premises.

Chris Grimes:

And talk club is, of course, you know how are you out of 10 is the one way to open up, a way of calibrating one's mental health. So, again, that's very um apposite for conversation as well, um. So, yes, I'm so happy to have you here and also, again, just finally, when I saw you speak, I was so happy to hear at the end when you said and I very recently married the love of my life, so you have found a new path in that regard as well.

Darren Edwards:

Yeah, it's funny, isn't it? I think we all do it, but whenever we go through breakups, we catastrophize that this is the end of happiness and this is the end of love as you know it. And you end of happiness and this is the end of love as you know it. And you're right, but not for the right reason. You know it's right because the person I've obviously gone on to meet and has become the love of my life and now my wife has shown me in more ways than I can count that it doesn't matter whether I'm sat down or stood up. You know, love is love and I am me, and unfortunately the other person couldn't, couldn't see that. But ultimately it was for my own benefit, because I went on to meet someone that, yeah, look forward to living the rest of life with and doing all the things that you know we can do.

Chris Grimes:

And I love that, whether I'm sat down or stood up, and the things you have thrown yourself into are extraordinary in how you're, as you say, of your own volition, redefining the impossible. I know your absolute ambition is to sit ski to. Is it the south pole or the north? Pole yeah so how come the question whenever? Why not pole please?

Darren Edwards:

I think it was to steer clear of polar bears. To be completely honest, um, no, I think I I grew up in I grew up in inner city, london, actually until like an early teen, but reading sort of shackleton and scott and amundsen and these kind of stories of polar exploration and antarctic, that kind of the golden era of antarctic exploration, it was like a world that I didn't think I'd ever, you know, get to get to be part of or to experience. And then, obviously, since my, my accident, I've had doors open and you used that analogy earlier of, you know, lubricating the doors that open and, um, the opportunities that have opened to me have been above and beyond whatever I could have imagined for myself, you know, able-bodied or not and one of those experiences and opportunities was to be part of an all-disabled team to sit, ski and ski across the largest ice cap in europe, which is the vatnirjokull in iceland, and to put it into context, this is an area the size of south wales if you look at google maps of iceland, it's a fifth of the of the land surface and me and two other guys with, um spinal cord injuries skied across unsupported, unassisted and halfway across this kind of frozen wonderland. You know not that there were days where we didn't think it was a wonderland. But you know this unseen, untouched environment and I think halfway across I started to think about maybe the South Pole could belong to to anyone. It doesn't have to be, you know, the kind of the Randolph Fines of the world. It could belong to somebody with a disability.

Darren Edwards:

And 12 days later, when we reached the eastern edge of that ice cap, I think in my head I was committed to to making yeah, like you said, you know, to redefining the impossible, which I've really enjoyed doing, particularly over the last three to four years. And the reason I call myself a groundbreaking adventurer, not a world record holder or whatever, is because I really don't give a, won't swear, but I don't really care about world records or titles or a plaque on the wall at home. You know, and that is the post and that's the dog lovely, the best yeah, exactly groundbreaking in because you know that's what you're trying to do.

Darren Edwards:

You're trying to push that line a bit further forward in the hope that it empowers somebody else with a disability of any form or anybody to go in to push that line a little bit further. So you know, you might be a record holder for a day, a week, a month, a year who cares, you know?

Chris Grimes:

but if you can empower other people to to fight their own fight and to arrive at their own metaphorical south pole, then love that yep, you're a complete testament to that wonderful idea that you know out of adversity comes great creativity, and you know you are a real force to be reckoned with. And, again, wonderful. Let's curate you, then, through the journey of the good, listening to show there's going to be a clearing a tree, a lovely juicy storytelling exercise called five, four, three, two, one. There's going to be some alchemy, some gold, a couple of random squirrels, a cheeky bit of shakespeare, a golden baton and the cake. So it's absolutely all to play for.

Chris Grimes:

Take this where you like, when you like, how you like, as deep as you like, and at the end we'll find out exactly where we can come and find you, not just about adaptive expeditions, but where we can book you as the extraordinary motivational speaker that you are as well. So, uh, darren, edwards, groundbreaking adaptive adventurer, where is what is a clearing for you? Where is your serious happy place? Where do you go to get clutter free, inspirational and able to think?

Darren Edwards:

I, uh, categorically do all of my best thinking, and creative thinking, in particular, outside. I don't think that's going to be any surprise for any of us, actually, but for me, as you've just heard, I have a dog. That dog is called Murphy, he's a border collie boundless amounts of energy and enthusiasm for being outside, which is a great excuse for me on, you know, the good days and the bad days, weather-wise and, I guess, mental health-wise as well. Let's touch on that for mental health day. Um, it'd be very easy for me to sit here and say that every day is an easy day, but it's obviously not true. Um, I'm still, you know, coming to terms with certain things that we've referred to, with my accident and with my dad and all that stuff.

Darren Edwards:

Um, so for me to get peace, um, and to feel connected to myself and to nature and to, you know, even feel connected to my dad, you know, go on a walk over.

Darren Edwards:

I'm very lucky that I live in Shropshire, so you've got kind of what feels like endless countryside on the doorstep. And for me, heading to the top of the Shropshire Hills, somewhere called Carlingmill Valley, you've got kind of, you know, landscape for miles around you, in every direction. You've got kind of. You know, landscape for miles around you in every direction and I feel very connected to to those things I mentioned there, to myself, to people like my dad that aren't here. I'm not religious, but you know, I feel like a sense of connection there and when it comes to my creative thinking and working through life's challenges and and opportunities, um, and also committing to some of these big life goals, like the south pole, you know, a lot of that took flight and and was really created in my mind on a walk, whether that was on my own, with my wife or with my friends, and for me that's the clearing that I couldn't do without and say the name of the shropshire, easy.

Chris Grimes:

Easy for me to say valley again.

Darren Edwards:

Carding Mill Valley.

Chris Grimes:

Carding Mill.

Darren Edwards:

Carding Mill as in a mill, right, thank you, it's beautiful.

Chris Grimes:

So if anybody has been, it's called the Good Listening to Show and I couldn't hear Carding Mill, sorry. And I love the fact that your dad is there too. Very relatably, my own father died just over a month ago and a friend very poignantly got in touch and said welcome to the Dead Dads Club. Not a pleasant place to be, but there you have it. So this is all very relatable, the human condition and perspective, which is what is boundless in what you bring to the equation of your own story. So I'm really excited.

Chris Grimes:

So, here we are then in Shropshire, in Carding Mill, I think you'll find at Valley. Now I'm going to arrive with a tree in your clearing and we're going to shake your tree to see which storytelling apples fall out. So this is where you've been kind enough, darren, to have thought about four things that have shaped you, three things that inspire you, two things that never felt attention, and that's where the random squirrels will come in. And then the one is a quirky or unusual fact about you. We couldn't possibly know about you until you tell us. It's not a memory test. So just to curate you through that, um, interpret the shaking of the canopy of your tree as you see fit yeah, should we start with number four?

Darren Edwards:

remind me of four again.

Darren Edwards:

It's four things that have shaped you four things that have shaped me. I'm not going to pick the obvious one, which is my accident, because I think that the first thing is, um, actually the day after my accident, when I had a surgeon stood at the end of my bed, um, who delivered the kind of, you know, that heart, yeah, obviously, that heartbreaking news, that, um, I severed, yeah, I'd broken my back and I was a spinal cord injury, um, but all you know, in amongst that kind of um, that quite serious message, he offered a sort of real, strong insight into what mattered most and he encouraged me to learn to look forward and not over my shoulder. And I think I said that at the talk because I think it's one of the most profound things I've ever been told. And at the time I kind of I don't know I reacted to that with a bit of anger because I wanted to be told that I could recover um, but then I think what he said was quite brilliant in its own way, which is so true.

Darren Edwards:

We, you know we spend, we can waste a lot of energy looking over our shoulder towards the past. No one here, no one listening, can change the past, but you know that encouragement to look to the future speaks to the, the doors that have opened, not the doors that have shut, and that kind of you know that's really powerful. So that's probably the first of the if I may.

Chris Grimes:

The word severance is really profound in that, because it's a severance of with from the past in terms of perspective, but it's also a new beginning and a new pathway and and it's almost like you've created your own new pathways despite the fact your spinal cord was cut. So the severance is extraordinary.

Darren Edwards:

Yeah, exactly. So that was probably the first. The second was four and a half months later, when that relationship ended and one of my physios, you know, could see how broken I was and I didn't really have any, I didn't feel like I had any resilience left and she kind of came up to me and said Look, I know that me telling you to be positive right now isn't isn't really gonna achieve anything. But what I want you to do is to think first and foremost about the man you want to become. And it was this concept of you know. Pick a point in the future. And she said to me you know, think four years in the future, think about the man that you've become, what he's gone on to achieve, and then retrace those steps to right here, right now. And all I want you to do is take the first tiny step towards that vision of who you want to become. And she's like it's not that your emotions don't matter, but it's that our actions can inform how we feel, just as they can vice versa. Just as they can vice versa. And I think that was the inspiration and the empowerment for me to, to pick this, this vision of, in four years time, being at the Paralympic Games, having turned adversity into, you know, um opportunity, adversity into the greatest moment of achievement in my life. So anytime that I kind of get, you know, revisited by the, the ghost of adversity, you know, with the example of my dad, I kind of think about all right, let's revisit that and think in a year's time how do I want to have overcome this loss? And you know what's he gone on to achieve and what was the first step he took. And that's why, in the aftermath of losing dad, I sort of, you know, started speaking because I thought if I could share my journey, it could help others.

Darren Edwards:

We set out to row across the English Channel for a mental health charity, which we did. It didn't mean that I didn't miss my dad, but it meant that I did something to help. And I think that probably speaks to the third element, which is purpose. I think for each of us we go through the sort of proverbial storm in life and having a sense of purpose is that sense of direction. You know, when it feels like your compass is spinning on its axis and you and you couldn't point which way is north, for all the money in the world. Having a sense of purpose is is like that guiding light and that kind of north star um.

Darren Edwards:

And for me, I think I learned a very important fourth thing when we did my first big expedition after my accident, which was we became the first people to kayak from Land Centre John O'Groats yeah, 1400 kilometres, 1000 miles across. You know some of the toughest coastal waters in Europe, let alone the UK, and me and a team of four injured veterans proved the world wrong by doing it and by becoming those first people to achieve this incredible feat. And it all started with me, as you saw on one of my videos, capsizing five minutes in. So it taught me the very important lesson that as long as you get back up every five minutes, you're still going to move your GPS marker towards your goal, and I think that speaks for so many of us in life. It's about celebrating the small milestones and the small wins just as much as it is the ultimate objective when we do get there. But don't be afraid to give it a go, because the enormity puts you off. Break it down into smaller chunks.

Chris Grimes:

Lovely. I hope you'll mention the wonderfully comic story of when you presented yourself to the Paralympic team with a vessel that you wanted to be in, to be in the team, and it was a canoe. I'm assuming it was a kite, yeah, so just would you mind, were you going to tell us that story anyway, or no?

Darren Edwards:

no, go on and I'll um.

Darren Edwards:

So I have been out of hospital for two months and I've kayaked for the first time in my life, two months earlier in a swimming pool and I was awful, um.

Darren Edwards:

But part of this kind of you know journey towards who I wanted to be obviously involved at some point, turning up to the Paralympic team and saying I'm here and I remember emailing the head coach about two months after my discharge and sort of you know somewhat exaggerating how much kayaking I'd done in my life, and then turned up on a very cold early March morning, still very much learning to kayak myself, but having probably led him to believe that I was an astute and able paddler, and pushed off from the side of this kind of lake in Nottingham with a the remit of drifting into the middle of the lake and doing a sprint in one direction and sprint in the other direction and then we take it from there and I got probably no more than half a meter away from the side before falling in and, kind of you know, coming up out of the water to the look of shock on on his face and he just kind of said, look, do you want to go home?

Darren Edwards:

And I was like, do you mind if I try one more time? And we anyway that one more time turned into about 20 more times, and every time I got maybe a meter at best further away from the side and I'd fall in. And I'd do it again and fall in and at the end of it he kind of sat me down in his office and said look, you've got absolutely no talent.

Darren Edwards:

Rude yeah, it was, it was, but he did say that he was going to be blunt, so that he was. But he said you know, you haven't got any talent, but I can't. I can't doubt the commitment and the determination that you're bringing to it and it's actually those values that we look for, more than physical ability, because in time we can make you stronger, faster, stable. But we can't change the way you think and for me it was a huge, you know, hugely profound, impactful lesson. There's so many lessons. I know you said pick four, but that's the fifth, but there's and then surprisingly a lot.

Chris Grimes:

I mean, what was extraordinary about that?

Darren Edwards:

you've got no talent, but we're going to take you on, which was just wonderful yeah, but I think it goes to show that, you know, especially when we're growing up, we think that everything is tied into natural ability, don't we? I did? Well, definitely. I thought that at school, and if you weren't naturally excelling at something, what was the point? And it took until you know 27 with a life-changing accident to be taught a very important lesson I wish I'd learned at 13.

Chris Grimes:

yes, the gift of hindsight we're coming on to notes you'd give to your younger self later on, as you know as well. But thank you for that. And then wind forward four years. You were at the Paralympics no line forward three years.

Darren Edwards:

Um we then it's the season before the Paralympic Games. We then have COVID, obviously the Paralympics pushed back from 2020 to 2021. I had to finish first. There was only like ever going to be one spot for the person that would qualify, and a couple of weeks before the race season started I tore my left shoulder in the gym and would ultimately watch that kind of race season unfold on YouTube live and kind of feeling sorry for myself. And that's where the concept of the Land's End to John O'Groats thing came about. And it wouldn't have happened had I qualified for the Parmpics and it wouldn't. This whole life as an adaptive adventurer wouldn't have um been given birth to had I qualified, because I would have stuck in paris for, so actually, what I considered a failure.

Chris Grimes:

So it was a huge lesson but we'll talk on that later about, you know, the lessons to my younger self, because that's another big one and forgive me for going on my own sort of catchy number four rabbit hole there, but that was a really lovely story, because I was struck with that and found it very, very funny, as did the rest of the audience. When you're talking about the, the, you have no talent, but we like your attitude, yeah. So sorry, back to your tree. We're in the shapeage of the canopy still yeah, um, what we'll be on now.

Darren Edwards:

So we've done the four lessons okay, now on to three things that inspire you.

Darren Edwards:

That's it. Three things inspire me. So for me, um, it's like, well, it's on the, the conversation point. I guess the first thing that I would say really inspired me, um, it was the paralympic games. But it wasn't, I guess, the paralympic games as such. It was the people and the stories that were part of it.

Darren Edwards:

And you know, I think I said to you that while I was starting my rehab, you start by being flat on your back for six weeks, immobilized. You can't move or bend or you can't do anything for yourself. But for two of those weeks, the Paralympics were on TV and all of a sudden sudden I saw people that had gone through a very similar lived experience to me. You know, extreme adversity, life-changing injuries that were showing the world exactly what was possible. And it was what was possible through perseverance and resilience. And I watched those games through a completely different lens. You know, I think for every games before that, 2012, whatever it'd been, I'd watched it as an able-bodied person and thought good for you, things that would annoy me. Now, if someone said good for you, I'd be like, okay, that's condescending, thank you very much. But that's probably the way I watched the Paralympic Games. And all of a sudden, these people are speaking as to what you can achieve yourself, and I don't think I've ever been more inspired by that but by anything in the paralympic game.

Darren Edwards:

So for me, I think that's first and foremost one thing that really does inspire me. Second, I think it's it's kind of you know, people sometimes make the mistake of thinking that inspirational. I hate being called an inspirational speaker, but you know you have to be on stage to be an inspirational person. We're actually, I think, some of the most inspiring people that I know are people that do it in the shadows, quietly, in everyday life, that persevere through difficult kind of you know um moments of adversity, whether that's health related or whether that's professional.

Darren Edwards:

You know um in their professional, personal lives, lives, and I think sometimes, yeah, people think that you have to climb Everest or kayak from Land's End to John O'Groats or do something you know extremely out there to be considered inspiring, whereas actually I think those everyday acts of resilience really inspire me. You know I've got personal friends that have gone through um cancer diagnosis, um that have, you know, without any fanfare, without any social media following, have fought that battle um for the people that they care about most. You know their sort of daughter at home or their wife, and I think that's that's incredibly inspiring um the idea of being a hero purely from the premise of it's how you show up each day.

Chris Grimes:

Yeah, yeah, it's on the daily it's the unsung heroes.

Darren Edwards:

I guess that's what I'm trying to say, like you know, one hand saying those Paralympic heroes, on the other hand I'm saying the unsung heroes, and you know what. Bring it really close to home for me that that third thing that inspires me is my wife, because, you know, since we met um, obviously I fell head over heels in love with her. She's incredible, um. But on our first date we spoke about children and we spoke about how being parents was really important to both of us and it would be a deal breaker for either person. So, thank god, we both agreed that we wanted at least three kids and she knew that being with me meant that fertility and, you know, having children would be different because for all the will in the world, you know, we probably can't conceive naturally.

Darren Edwards:

So we've gone through, you know, five rounds of IVF which resulted in three miscarriages, two ultimate no luck from the start. And I saw her go through that process and it was heartbreaking because as the man, you can't take the pain away from you, can't take that role away from the woman. But she was so resilient, she was so undeterred to achieve what she wanted to achieve, which was to be a mum and she was so willing to adapt the way that she did things, whether that was through IVF, icsi and ultimately we're about to start our families as two parents adopting a baby, and for me to see her go through that really incredibly difficult journey, but to see how she doesn't give up hope of what it is that she wants to become, which is a mum, and for us to start a family and see the way she's willing to pivot and adapt has been so inspiring. And one of the things I love about her is her resilience. And, yeah, I'm very inspired by the person that I get to spend my life with.

Chris Grimes:

The moniker of you both being adaptive adventurers is just profound, because it's about how you adapt and continue in life's adventures. It's perfect.

Darren Edwards:

Yeah, for sure.

Chris Grimes:

Lovely. And now we're on to two things that never fail to grab your attention and borrowed from the film Up, that's a bit, oh squirrels. You know what never fails to grab your attention, irrespective of anything else that might be happening for you in your hectic life yeah, the two things that never failed to grab my uh, grab my attention just say my emotion and, um, my attention.

Darren Edwards:

So I think, for the first thing for me, obviously, as you know, um, a part of an occupational um, I was gonna say occupational hazard, but it's the opposite of a hazard, because it's an occupational benefit of being a speaker is that you get to come to the conferences, like the EC conference, at the ICC, and often I remember this year that particular conference I was introduced as the person that no one's going to know, the name of which I will happily accept because I'm not on TV and I'm not a famous face, because I'm not on TV and I'm not a famous face. But obviously you get to share these kind of things with people that you've kind of looked up to or have been inspired by. And one of the people I always remember that I got to see at a conference was one of the first people I ever saw on those Paralympic Games, on that little hospital monitor, a lady called Emma Wiggs who was. I saw her get out of the wheelchair, get into a kayak this is probably where the kayak inspiration came from and saw her kind of drift off, and I think that was the, the kind of like the seed had been planted very much there, um, but you know to speak to wider than just Emma.

Darren Edwards:

I think something that never fails to grab my attention is how fortunate I am, um, to get to be part of some of these incredible events where you see the names, you see the stories and you know that you can just turn up a little bit early or you can stay a little bit later and sit and listen and be inspired by. You know some of these stories and I think there's a real importance of humility there. You know, I think as a speaker, you can't think that, um, you're the only person that can speak about resilience or something like that, and if I've learned anything in the last eight years, it's the importance of being humble, and my accent was a massive lesson in humility and and stuff. So I always go out of my way to make sure I listen to other people's stories and to take inspiration from other people's journeys as well. So that's one thing that never fails to to grab my, to grab my attention, and one thing I do love about um being a speaker. And the other thing I think is similar, but obviously we've.

Darren Edwards:

We've referenced adaptive expeditions and this kind of company that me and a friend set up earlier only earlier this year actually, but out of the kind of the sad reality that 99% of people with a disability or a life changing injury don't have the network of friends around them that I had, you know, and it never failed to. I never, it never. I was never not aware of how fortunate I was from day one, that I had not only a friend that risked his life to save my life yes, which he did, you know, matt could have died doing what he did to save my life will you be saying a bit more about that anyway, because that is an extraordinary story about how he dived on top of you to stop you falling off.

Chris Grimes:

The next, yeah, for sure for sure.

Darren Edwards:

Well, yeah, I'll say I'll say the second thing, because I'll go back and then explain. So, for me, one thing that never fails to get my attention is how lucky I am to have the people I have around me. You know, friends and family, and and we've spoken about perspective very briefly and for me, my accident and the months that followed were an awful, um, awful situation, but a really great illustration of how fortunate and lucky I was, you know, to have those people around me. So that's the second thing. So, you know, on the day of my accident, um, as I fell and as that rock collapsed, matt was stood on a on a ledge, you know, no more than six foot wide, about 40 foot below me, and he sees his best friend falling through the air. I'm thinking I'm going to fall the whole way to the roadside below and that was the end of me.

Darren Edwards:

But I somehow managed to hit this ledge flat on my back and obviously I break my back on impact. But I hit it with enough force that I keep going. So I hit and I'm almost about to bounce off and slip, raining 180 feet below me and that sprints from where he stood and just sprints with a mission of intercepting me before I get to the edge of that that little ledge, and slip off, and all I remember is the feeling of tumbling uncontrollably and then, all of a sudden, this weight on top of my chest and initially I thought that weight was a rock. I thought that weight was, yeah, a second bit of thought that weight was, yeah, a second bit of rock that had been dislodged. That was just sort of going to crush me and I opened my eyes, having realised that I'd stopped, and I opened my eyes to see Matt on top of me and he just threw his body on top of mine.

Darren Edwards:

He reached me as I was about to slip off that ledge and you know, we both know that him grabbing hold of me could have taken us both, you know so. So one thing that never fails to to grab my attention is how lucky I am, and that's why we've set up adaptive expeditions, because, unfortunately, for others they don't have those. You know friends that are just right, okay. Well, if you can't climb, we're going to kayak, if you can't that, we're going to this, and and that's why we're trying to give these opportunities for for people with, you know, life-changing injuries and conditions and and we can be the people that are, the are there matt, so to speak so is matt, your co-founder.

Chris Grimes:

Just so I get my story no, no, no.

Darren Edwards:

No. Matt is far too busy in the navy um doing lots of special stuff, um so nick moral, a friend of mine from up here, who you know has been part of part of my life for a while now, and I don't doubt that matt is always close.

Chris Grimes:

Yes, yeah, he is gosh. What a story. And now a quirky or unusual fact about you that we couldn't possibly know about you, darren, tell us.

Darren Edwards:

There's one thing that not many people know, and that is that and this makes TJ laugh, because she's actually got talent and she's she can act and sing. I've been in one, two. I've been in three Hollywood films, only as an only, only as an extra in the background. I've been a medieval knight. I've been a CIA agent, and I've been in a Bollywood film as well, having been told that I wouldn't need to dance for the scene and then found myself in the middle of a dance scene, which was quite funny, but the funny things that you will do for money when you're a university student in London.

Chris Grimes:

This is circa before everything else changed.

Darren Edwards:

Exactly, yeah, this is the phase of life where I was a history student and budding Hollywood film star.

Chris Grimes:

We have mentioned that you're a former soldier as well. I know you mentioned Matt is in the Navy, but where were you in the Army?

Darren Edwards:

So the way life looked for me was climbing, mountaineering.

Darren Edwards:

I was just starting my career as a history teacher and I joined the Army Reserve three years earlier than that, the local unit, the Rifles. I very quickly found out there was something called the SAS Reserve and, once again, a bit like those Shackleton books I'd read lots of books about David Sterling and the Special Forces in the Second World War and someone made a throwaway comment to me about, I think, one of the lads in my unit had gone for the selection process, which is the the toughest reserve selection process in the world by far, um, and he'd failed it and made some throwaway comment to me like it's, it's too difficult, you wouldn't be able to do it. And I think that one comment sealed sealed my fate, as you know I don't know, being incredibly stubborn and my ego being bruised that someone thought I wouldn't be able to do it. So I signed up and and went and had an incredibly fun couple of years before my accident. So, and and that, and you know, my accident brought an end, uh, to that career as well.

Chris Grimes:

So I went to david sterling monument very, very recently. A very good co, mutual friend of friend of Joe Bradshaw's and mine, a wonderful man called Dave Stewart Not the other one from Fresh Air Leadership who I would encourage you to get in touch with as well, so I know he would love your story as well.

Darren Edwards:

Yeah so. But yeah so it's like you know, if we go touch very briefly back on what the surgeon said, I guess you know it's about looking forward, not looking back. And you know my life, there were things that I was leaving behind me, which I was sad to leave, but you know, if you focus on those things, you'll never find the good stuff that's still ahead of you.

Chris Grimes:

Hence adaptive adventurer, exactly, and we've shaken your tree, which we did deliciously. Congratulations to you.

Darren Edwards:

Now we stay in the clearing, which is still in the valley in shropshire called cling.

Chris Grimes:

No, not cling mill, carding mill valley. Yeah, yeah, clearing valley. Yeah, we're still there, and now we're going to talk about alchemy and gold. So you've been giving me and us this by the bucket load in any case, but when you're at purpose and in flow, uh, darren edwards, what are you absolutely happiest doing in what you are here purposefully to reveal to the world?

Darren Edwards:

I think I'm happiest, um, now I I think for the first couple of years I was happiest when I was pursuing my own stuff and proving to myself what was still possible, you know, and that's like the whole lands and sonic roads thing and seven marist and seven days, seven continents, and like all of those life-changing experiences that were serving the purpose of showing me that I was still so capable and that this adaptive mindset could overcome stuff, um, but that was only ever going to last so long, I think, because that was a relatively selfish um sense of the selfless sense of purpose which I think is the real, genuine sense of purpose that I found now is in helping others. I can't tell you how much it means to me, particularly now. Like you know, we referenced my dad after talks, when someone comes up to me and says I've been really struggling and I just want to say thank you, and only a couple of months after I started ever speaking and stumbling my way through my own story, I remember a young lad coming up to me who must have been a similar age in his early 30s, and he kind of pulled me aside at the end of a talk and said that he was thinking of going home that night and taking his own life. And he was like I just wanted to say, had you been in here today I think I would have done it, and I kind of sat there in a state of slight shock and didn't know what to say. I just said, you know, I'm glad, or whatever.

Darren Edwards:

I think I just stumbled over, I got back into my car and before I turned my car and I was burst into tears because I think it was that sense of purpose fulfilled that I'd started speaking for. And you know, adaptive Expeditions is another opportunity to help other people. So I think I found really clear purpose and sincere, genuine purpose in helping others. Now, you know, after those couple of years of figuring things out for myself, I now am most fulfilled, most happy and like I'm living the life I'm supposed to be living. When I see the impact that you know either the story or the logistical support of you know that we're going to kayak across scotland and we're going to do all the difficult bits for you and all you've got to do is turn up and enjoy it, and I think that's when. That's when I really feel like I'm living the life I was always meant to be living. So now I believe that I was meant to have my accident.

Chris Grimes:

What an extraordinary perspective, and I was just thinking that you said you're not religious, but it sounds like you're fatalistic in the point of view of you are here for a purpose and you found that.

Darren Edwards:

Yeah, yeah, I don't know if I'm yeah, I don't, I'm agnostic, I'm open-minded, think I'm spiritual, I think the universe absolutely blows my mind, but I feel like you know, we're very lucky to to have potentially 60, 70, 80, 90 years on this planet, or you know however many, so I don't know true purpose can be found in helping others and making this is the best place to to live.

Chris Grimes:

If this is the one seat of existence in the universe, let's make it a good one yes, wow, just allowing a bit of silence there, and now I'm going to award you with a cake. Uh, darren edwards, so do you like cake?

Darren Edwards:

I do, I try and control that, that love of cake, but yeah so it's tragically, until we can get to meet again in person.

Chris Grimes:

It's only a metaphorical cake, so what type of cake would you like that you're going to get? And put a cherry on the cake of?

Darren Edwards:

uh, the go-to is a carrot cake, to be fair, so I'm going to hold you to that though yes, please, and my pleasure and I will come.

Chris Grimes:

I'll come around your house with a carrot cake. So this looks like a carrot cake actually, by happy accident, I think it's a dog's, but I found it when I was trying to work out what comedy props to use. So now you get to put a cherry on the cake in the form of what's a favourite inspirational quote. You did mention what your physiotherapist first said to you. It doesn't have to be that one, but it could be. But all the first thing the surgeon said to you but what is, would you, you say, your favorite inspirational quote? That's always given you sucker and pulled you towards your future um?

Darren Edwards:

are we allowing it to be from somebody that I've not met?

Darren Edwards:

absolutely yeah, I think for me, um, well, I I've, I've been lucky to have been told some really profound um things by, you know, those unsung heroes that are in the shadows, like Kate and the surgeon. But the last few years, for me, the quote by Nelson Mandela and I think it was 2000, which is a simple one, but it always seems impossible until it's done, always seems impossible until it's done, and I think that speaks to to an awful lot of why I do what I do, um, you know, and why the south pole is, is a thing for me it's kind of about redefining that sense of what's possible and what's impossible and, uh, and that quote gives me hope, I think and and the whole quote it's so it's always impossible until it's done.

Chris Grimes:

But that could not be accurate. I'm sorry it always seems impossible until it's done and how are you getting on with the epic quest to the south pole to sit ski? How's that going?

Darren Edwards:

we're doing good, uh, yeah. So, um, training's going well, the team's, uh, fully formed, you know, including matt, who I wouldn't be here without including friends from, um, my previous life with ss reserve, um, and we're building towards next december where we'll be flying out to antarctica to to attempt to, you know, put I was about to say a line in the sand but a line in the snow, wouldn't it? You know, currently, the the biggest distance done by somebody on a six-key is 100 kilometers and we're attempting to do 333. So it's a significant, you know, groundbreaking move forward. But, like I said to you, I really hope that all it does is inspire someone to go the next year and, to you know, wipe my record from existence.

Chris Grimes:

And when you said next December, are we talking December 2025?

Darren Edwards:

We are yeah.

Chris Grimes:

And could I live on air, invite you back to tell us how that went. Come and do another ski through the clearing when you get to Sweden, because I don't doubt you will.

Darren Edwards:

Yeah, no, I'd love to Thank you.

Chris Grimes:

But surely it's impossible. No, it's been done, fantastic, great. So now, what notes, help or advice might you proffer to a younger version of yourself?

Darren Edwards:

I think we've referred to it very briefly, but I think probably the most profound one for me would be that kind of concept of talent versus effort.

Darren Edwards:

Because for me, as a young teen, I definitely was very middle of the road.

Darren Edwards:

I was never, like it, bottom of the class, never top of the class, but as a result I bought into this concept that it was all about natural talent, you know, whereas actually the experience with, say, going through selection with the SAS reserve, you see the stronger, fitter, faster, better looking, you know all of those people they quit or they fail and actually what you're left with is this group that are just super determined, super unsung in their approach, just very persevering, resilient, able to adapt.

Darren Edwards:

And then I guess that same lesson learned again through a different um parable, which was with steve when I turned up at the paralympic kayaking team which is, look, I don't care that you haven't got talent, I don't care that you can't stay the right way up for more than 20 seconds, what I care about is that you're determined, you're committed and you know I I don't doubt that you're going to give it everything you need to give it until you get to where you want to get to, and I'd love to go back to 13 year old darren and say look, I know that you're not top of class, I know that people doubt that you're ever going to achieve this or that, but you're not trying to be anybody else, you're trying to, you know, be the better version of yourself, the best version of yourself, and actually, all of these experiences of failing and not winning races and and you know, being um, I don't know um being doubted, ultimately are going to make you a stronger adult and someone that is more likely to go on and achieve incredible things than the person that won every race, that was the top of every class, that never struggled, and I think that's a really powerful lesson.

Chris Grimes:

And please say yes, but I hope you are in educational institutions the world over talking to young people.

Darren Edwards:

I do enjoy talking to young people because, unlike an adult audience, you never know what you're going to get. I think some of the questions are brilliant, and secondary school is probably the best place to cut your teeth as a speaker, because they're savage. If you bore them, you know that you're boring them.

Chris Grimes:

Yes, pish and tush. I doubt that happens, so we're going to ramp up to Shakespeare. I'll just ask one other question. You might have already covered this, but what's the best piece of advice you've ever been given, even if this is a reincorporation?

Darren Edwards:

Best piece of advice I've ever been given would probably be Kate's thing. You, uh, best piece of advice I've ever been given would probably be kate's thing. You know, it's not about how you feel right now, it's about who you want to be, because I just apply that to my life. Whenever I go through something difficult you know relationship breakup, losing dad, not qualifying for the paralympics, all of that stuff it's always come back to kate's advice of yeah, it sucks right now, but in a year's time or in a four year's time, I want to be this person.

Chris Grimes:

And Kate is a trailblazing example of one of your heroes on the daily. What's Kate's second name, just to amplify her?

Darren Edwards:

Kate Betts. She's a physiotherapist at the Midland Centre for Spinal Injuries. So, kate, you know well. I hope she listens.

Chris Grimes:

If not, I'm going to send her this podcast. Yes, and I'd like to meet her too. She sounds, she's heroic and wonderful. Yes, all that sheblang. Okay, so we're coming up to shakespeare shortly to talk about legacy, but just before we get there, this is the pass the golden bat moment, please. Now you've experienced this from within. Who would you most like to pass the golden baton along to? To keep the golden thread of this storytelling going? Darren?

Darren Edwards:

um, there's a young lad called um jack ryan, who came along to the first of our adaptive expeditions trips and he was someone. About a year ago I got a phone call from and he said look up, um, this is my story and I'd really love to go on an adventure with you because I'm really trying to to find my way through life. And Jack's story was, you know, he's a carpenter, 25 years old. He started to lose his eyesight, went to the um, you know, went to, uh, the doctors, and he was diagnosed with a rare optical condition. Um, I the life, me, I can't remember it and over the course of the next three months, jack went from fully 2020 vision to um, absolutely no vision, you know, complete darkness. And you know, we're now three years later and I think everybody listening can't imagine how hard it would be to lose your eyesight.

Darren Edwards:

And for jack, I am eternally, constantly inspired by him.

Darren Edwards:

Um, he handles it far better and greater than I think I would ever manage that.

Darren Edwards:

And what I've really loved about adaptive expeditions is that you form friendships with people like jack and you see how he is still a strong, able, physically fit guy who can lift a kayak up over his head and move things and you see actually how he can help me and I can help him. And there's this beautiful kind of dance where, regardless of your disabilities, you can support each other and one supports the other in a way that the other can't support the other other and one supports the other in a way that the other can't support the other. And I have the highest hopes that, whilst he is still very much in the rebuild phase of his life like I was in the first three, four years that jack is going to go on to achieve incredible things in his life and will inspire countless people by showing them that perhaps you don't need to be able to see the light to find it my privilege to speak to Jack Ryan, if you'd be kind enough to furnish me with a warm introduction.

Chris Grimes:

He's also got a very heroic name already. Jack Ryan has his own TV series already, and this Jack Ryan needs his own too. Obviously Wonderful, thank you for that. And now, inspired by Shakespeare and all the world's estates, this is the actual. It's not the actual first folio, but this is when I went to drama school, to the bristol or big theater school. This is the actual complete works that I I got for myself. It says here chris grimes 16 986 anyway. So this is about legacy, now borrowed from all the worlds of stage, with all the better women merely players. We're going to talk about legacy now. Darren uh, how, when all is said and done, would darren edwards groundbreaking, adaptive, adaptive adventurer, how would you most like to be remembered?

Darren Edwards:

uh, I, it sounds weird, but I like to be remembered by putting myself out of a job.

Darren Edwards:

I like to be remembered that that there are so many.

Darren Edwards:

There's like a whole new generation, generation of inspiring adaptive adventurers that do incredible things, that the mere story of Darren Edwards, who was one of the first, is actually one of the dullest stories to tell, because you know adventure in the outdoors and places like Cardamom Valley and hills and rivers and lakes they belong to all of us, and hills and rivers and lakes, they belong to all of us. And I really hope that what we're setting up with AE Adaptive Expeditions empowers this next generation of people that will know no different than opportunity and possibility in the great outdoors. And not hear that word impossible, because I heard it over and over and over again until I was sticking the tooth with it, and and that's probably why redefining impossible is what we've called the South Pole thing, because it's just challenging that concept. Um, so I I'd love that. The legacy is that we kind of we build this community of inspiring people that do incredible things that then go and share their story on stage and I can just sit and watch wonderful.

Chris Grimes:

Where can we find out all about you, darren edwards, and everything you're up to in the world of adaptive expeditions? Where can we find out all about you on the internet?

Darren Edwards:

uh yeah. So darren edwards underscore adventurer is my kind of social media thing. For most things I'm not on, much to be fair. Instagram and Facebook Um, adaptive expeditions is adaptive expeditions um goes unsurprisingly. And um, yeah, darren Edwards speakercom is the website. But uh yeah, social media is the best place to engage. Is there a LinkedIn as well? Obviously Wonderful.

Chris Grimes:

And uh, and LinkedIn as well, obviously Wonderful. And if you haven't already booked Darren Edwards as a speaker I've seen him, he's awesome you should book him. This is great, as this has been your moment in the sunshine in the Good Listening 2 show Stories of Distinction and Genius is there anything else you'd like to say?

Darren Edwards:

Darren, I was going to say thank you, obviously, for having me on, thank you to Joe Bradshaw, but just as, I guess, a sort of final takeaway for the listeners, I think for me, if I've three words that one of my closest friends said to me while I was in intensive care that have stuck with me and resonate every single day um, strengths for adversity and it's the name of the talk I often give and I think um it. You know we all go through difficult moments in our lives. We all experience adversity, at home, at work, um, and you know it's just don't give up, don't give up hope. And you know things are tough right now. But, like Kate said, think about the person you want to become, the person that has bounced forward, not simply bounced back. And um, yeah, adversity, if anything, will make us stronger.

Chris Grimes:

So there's a lovely connection to that outdoor app. What three words and you all, what three words are strength through adversity yeah, there we go like that.

Chris Grimes:

So thank you so much. It's been an absolute privilege listening to you, darren Edwards. Thank you for listening across the various social media platforms as well. If you'd like a conversation about guesting too, then have a look at thegoodlisteningtoshowcom. That's the website.

Chris Grimes:

So, ladies and gentlemen, this has been the glorious Darren Edwards. I've been Chris Grimes and just listen to this outro music. Good night. You've been listening to the Good Listening To Show with me, chris Grimes.

Chris Grimes:

If you'd like to be in the show too, or indeed gift an episode to capture the story of someone else with me as your host, then you can find out how care of the series strands at the goodlisteningtoshowcom website, and one of these series strands is called Good Books. If you've always wanted to write your autobiography but have always got a bit stuck, then maybe Good Books and the Good Listening To Show can help, using the unique structure of the show with me, chris Grimes, as your host. Together we can take a trip down memory lane as we record the 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 of your life story, all set in the clearing or serious happy place of your choice. So, yes, get in touch if you'd like some help in writing your very own good book in the form of your autobiography, the story behind the story of being you. Tune in next week for more stories from the clearing and don't forget to subscribe and review wherever you get your podcasts.